Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Poor, poor men!

No, I really mean that. I feel very sorry for men today. Especially those brave young (and not so young) guys on the dating scene. They live in a world of feminine deception, estrogen-laden illusions, bait and switch and ultimately sheer treachery.

We all know about the falsehood of falsies. That's why they're called falsies, right? Bras with built in boobs. Pushing up and out an A cup sized breast under the guise of a C cup delight. I gather most men know that the breasts that see on that gal standing at the Friday's bar are quite possibly counterfeit cuppas. Even if they're real they could be fake. Men get that.

But there's a new traitor in town. It's called the "tummy tuck jean." Even I have to ask WTF is that? How about a pair of jeans that must have some sort of girdle like material that claims to make you a size smaller. OK, so if you're a fourteen and you squeeze yourself into a twelve and feel all svelte and sexy what happens to the poor slob who unleashses your tidal wave of tubbiness at midnight??? Really? Do you really want to start your foreplay with "THAR SHE BLOWS!" I think not.

If you're a size fourteen you can be every bit as attractive and sexy and wonderful as a size two. I admit that if you're very obese you might have a tougher time landing a date, but that's not news to you, right? This obsession with size and numbers and looks is daunting.

I guess when I really think about it, it's the WOMEN I feel most sorry for. Love yourselves, darn it. A man who loves you more as a size 12 than a size 14 isn't worth spit.


mcewen said...

It's one of my pet peeves too [magazines not fake body parts!] I thought that kind of thing would have been phased out by the time my daughter was a adult. Now she's 25, I'm have a repeat 'prescription' with my younger daughter.
Best wishes

AhvaRahn said...

Thar she blows, indeed, and that catholic sports car comment on Monday; you are a smile-maker. I gave up on the fluffernutter after one try, but I do need to walk, not that I am looking for a date -my beloved loves me if I walk or not- but I need to walk, and dispose of a few pounds on the way around the lake. If all else fails, I'll have to try those tucky-in pants. I might look ridiculous, but at least I will be ever so slighter and ridiculous.

Be well,

Kim Stagliano said...

I just think we should be able to be happy at any size or shape as long as we're healthy. Those pants really annoyed me. But I will not give up my padded bras so who am I to talk! LOL!


Demon Hunter said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Demon Hunter said...

Great post! I really think that media images are dangerous; especially when I see 5-year-olds on talk shows with eating disorders. I have never been a skinny minny, and have had no problem taking the men away from the skinny women! Hehe! :*)
Thanks for visiting my blog! Thanks for the lovely comment. I do love my job and your compliment came at the right time because I had a very frustrating day; not because of the wonderful clients I work with, but my cooworkers are maniacs! LOL.

writtenwyrdd said...

Well, I've worked in jobs that are primarily the realm of guys all my life, and they actually (most of them) don't seem to care if a woman has implants over real large breasts. It's all in the visuals.

So, to heck with the fountain of flab letting loose. Just get undressed in the dark, lol.

But I agree, you can be a 14 and sexy. You can be fat adn sexy. It's all good if you feel good about yourself.