Kim Rossi

Everything I need to know about medicine I learned from a margarine advertisement.

There's talk of a new pill that will allow women to "turn off" their period. It's a pill made from hormones that you take every day, no break. No break? No annoying period.

Remember oh, about twenty years ago when docs started telling women they'd figured out how to hit the "pause" button on menopause? "Shucks, we'll just turn it off with hormone replacement!" Then about three years ago, the studies said "Oops! Maybe that wasn't such a good idea." and the very same docs back pedalled faster than Dick Cheney getting caught at a Greenpeace rally.

Have we become a society obsessed with convenience and dedicated to avoiding anything unpleasant, at least in the short term, with no regard to long term ramifications? Would you men trust Toyota if they said, "Trust us! You never have to change the oil in the new Camry!"

Oh, I can see turning off your period for convenience in many instances. Your wedding day. (That's the serious one, yes?) Or, you're skating in the Olympics and don't think your lumpy pad will razzle dazzle the judges. Maybe the boys at The Bada Bing got a glimpse of your tampon string peeking out of your G-string and you feel embarrassed? Perhaps you want to go for a swim and haven't figured out how to use a tampon..... I'm teasing, here. You get that, right?

I really do realize there are times when you might want to not have your period. But for years at a time? Don't we need the monthly blood loss? Don't our watoozies (see previous post comment trail on the definition of a douche) need the monthly flush?

I have three girls with special needs. One of whom has crossed into puberty. With two to follow. Believe me, I'd LOVE to get rid of her period. It's messy, a lot of work for the week for me, for her Dad (who has learned how to change a pad like a pro, bless his heart) and her teachers who care for her at school. But at what cost to her longterm health? I couldn't do it to her.

Remember that old Imperial Margarine commercial, "It's not NICE to fool with mother nature!" Duck! There's a lightning bolt coming.