Good grief! Women have always tricked men into thinking they had better figures than they do. Or maybe men, who designed clothes, demanded it? Think Mad Men and the be-girdled beauties, corsets, bras filled with water, gel and such. Well, it seems undergarments have "stiff" competition from the entire wardrobe.
Imagine this - on Thursday I went to Trader Joe's to stock up on food and drink and stuff for our weekend at my Mother In Laws. We bring all food we're going to eat, as if we're camping. We take all food out when we leave (including the log for the fire) - like The Grinch. Don't ask.
There's a lovely shop next to Trader Joe's called Harper's. Check out the site, (the music sounds like a bad porn movie.) The store is mostly fur and jewelry - it took me several peeks in the window to work up my courage to enter, since I do not have a fur and jewerly budget, unless you mean Muppets and the occasional sterling earrings (my last pair was $10, puzzle pieces from NAA while at Autism One.)
Turns out, there's a clothing boutique in Harpers - and they do have lovely, wearable clothes at good prices. Fine brands, but not exclusive. And you can find things that don't make this 45 year old women feel like she's trying to look like a 20 year old, nor do they make me feel like I'm wearing Sag Harbor and Village from Vermont Country Store.
I bought a layered look T-shirt off the sidewalk sale rack. $14.99! I didn't try it on. I threw it into my duffel bag and took it to the Cape.Friday night: MIL is taking us out to dinner at Cooke's Seafood
Yum! I grab the T-shirt and go to put it on. Struggle, squish, twist, dislocated shoulder WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS SHIRT!!! I read the tag: Teez-Her. It's got a GIRDLE BUILT INTO IT! I swear to God - it's got a spandex center layer under the cotton - and I though it was just a layered T-shirt.
Can I tell you? Nothing says, "You're fat" more than an uncomfortable sausage casing of spandex swaddling your middle and riding up and around.
And what of poor men? They've most caught on that the boobs aren't actually the boobs they imagine under the shirt. They are usually stuffing and propping and lifting and separating and cajoled into place. Good God, you go on a date with a nice looking gal, you get her into bed and she expands like a freaking raft boat! "PFooooooottttt!