Thursday, August 16, 2007

Eat for God's Sake!

First, I am not poking fun at eating disorders, OK? I've seen girls who weigh 85 pounds and it's dreadful for all concerned. BUT..... Today's women are so consumed with "self" and "image" and staying young and thin that I think the level of selfishness involved is what is really the problem.

Studies show women who get cosmetic surgery are more likely to commit suicide. You have twenty year olds undergoing cosmetic surgery for what? To look 13? What's next, pulling all your teeth out of your head to acheive that four month old look?

What has happened to us that we are so focused on image that we make ourselves sick, we deny ourselves food, we submit to invasive surgery? I just ate two donuts. I worked out for 30 minutes this morning. And I ate the God damned donuts. They tasted good. They felt good on my tongue. I will not throw up my donuts. I liked 'em.

I can't wait to be an old woman with crazy white hair and harsh pink lipstick and cream blush stuck in my wrinkles. Nuts? Maybe. But I plan to allow myself the luxury of growing older. I'll try to look as nice as I can every day - but really, harm myself to do so?

When you have kids with challenges you get a healthy dose of perspective. You wake up to a perspective ENEMA every f'ing day. You go to sleep on a perspective pillow, and it ain't filled with soft down feathers. Worry about my body to the point of self-injury? Who has the time?

To the gal in the article below - good luck sweetie. To you and to your kids, if you have them. Oh! And the NYT article I read this morning? "Regular women undergoing cosmetic surgery." A women took out $10,000 in loans to pay for fake tits so she'd fill out a bathing suit top. After she had kids her boobs disappeared. Hey pal, my KIDS disappeared -and I buy padded swimsuit tops..... And twenty somethings using credit cards to pay for cosmetic surgery but they will not pay for HEALTH INSURANCE! Docs worried about that trend. Terrific, Tiffany will have the biggest boobs in the ER when she goes there for health care. Fabulous.....

This is from the Boston news:

Most people think of eating disorders as a problem that strikes girls and young women. But increasingly, experts say eating disorders are becoming an epidemic among baby boomers,

At 41 years old, Lauren is finally gaining control of her body and her life. She has suffered from bulimia and anorexia for 25 years. I consider it like a heroin addiction, Lauren said. I was terrified at this time last year that I was going to die.

Lauren is not alone in her struggle. Experts say between 1 and 3 million middle-aged women in this country have anorexia or bulimia. One out of every 10 eating disorder patients is over 40.

There's probably a several fold increase in the last decade of middle-aged women seeking treatment, said Dr. David Herzog, director of the Harvard Eating Disorders Program at Mass General Hospital.

According to Herzog, a mid-life crises, or the fight against mid-life weight gain can trigger eating disorders. They may be married or suffered a divorce. They may be have had a recent loss of a parent, he said. There is pressure out there to maintain a more youthful appearance.

Dr. Herzog said some women have been struggling in silence for years. But whether the patient is middle-aged or a teenage girl, he said characteristics to look out for are primarily the same.

"They may be restricting their intake or they may be binging eating or engaging in self-induced vomiting or purging behavior, said Herzog.

Lauren wants people to know that women of all ages are winning their personal battles with eating disorders by getting help from treatment centers like MEDA, the Multiservice Eating Disorders Association, of Newton.

Lauren said she is not bulimic or anorexic anymore. I am feeling amazing. I'm learning myself again, I feel healthy, she said.


Stephen Parrish said...

I will not throw up my donuts. I liked 'em. You kill me.

I find it interesting (for lack of a better word) that anorexia and obesity are both on the rise. About 5% of females and 1% of males suffer from anorexia nervosa, and about one in every four Americans is obese.

Kim Stagliano said...

Hi, Stephen! I think I smell a HuffPo piece here, you?

Katie Alender said...

I think about this a lot, Kim. Partially because I also tend to eat the donuts but I haven't yet found full peace with it.

But also because what's going to happen to women, to standards of beauty, when we're all living to be 120 years old? Will we adjust our standards or live in self-conscious misery for 60 years? I can't help thinking that as we spend more of our lives in wrinklier bodies, the divide between the young and beautiful and the old and not-so-much will continue to widen.

Unless the zombies get us. One nice thing about zombies is they have very low rates of eating disorders.

I have about nine new book ideas thanks to this post, not the least of which is "Rosturna, the Anorexic Zombie".

amanda said...

I just about wet my pants - eating 2 donuts and keeping them - I did the same thing!! Kim I swear we were separated at birth! My excuse/rational was I'd been up since 3am, what was yours?

You have the potentially dubious honor of being my very first American I actually like.

Stephen Parrish said...

I think I smell a HuffPo piece here, you?

Damn, I didn't think of it, so now I won't get credit for it.

Katie: No need to worry about growing old. Bird flu's gonna get you long before that.

Katie Alender said...

So then it's a matter of who wins between flu-birds and zombies. That's gonna be a heck of a fight.

The Anti-Wife said...

How lucky you are to be able to eat 2 donuts at one time. Just one more thing to admire about you!

Kim Stagliano said...

Amanda, the reason? I wanted them. There are FEW things in life that one covets and can actually HAVE without legal, vow-al or other ramifications.

1st American you like? Jeez, I mean, we all like Sean Connery. You don't have ONE other Yank you like? So, um, thank you....

Kim Stagliano said...

Anti-wife - you got a mouth don't you? Voila! Go for it. It feels good. Screw the guilt. Enjoy.

Milehimama said...

It doesn't help matters when the magazine covers at the checkout lead with two stories -
"Amazing University of Kentucky Shake Diet! Lose 60 pounds in 60 days!"


"Sinfully delicious Peach recipes - cupcakes, cheesecakes, and More!".

And darn it, I cook everything from scratch, carefully avoiding colors and MSG and certain preservatives... so when I get a chance to eat a Big Mac, I'm going for it!

Kim Stagliano said...

Go for it Mama. You're right. The women's mags are a joke (unless I am submitting an article to them in which case they are one word shy of the Bible...) Lose 40 pounds! Easy 17 layer chocolate bomb recipe! Please your husband tonight! Is he cheating on you! on the cover......

DONUTS RULE! Big Mac? ICK ICK ICK, slimey sauce. Kimmy don't do mayo based sauces.... Creme filled donuts? Bring em on.

henri said...

Those articles in women's mags about how to tell whether your husband's cheating on you---they're really insightful.

So I'm told.

Kim Stagliano said...

Lipstick on the collar, Henri? Credit card receipts from the No Tell Motel up the street? Or the errant STD? LOL!

You Sharpie you!

henri said...

When your guts tell you he is, he is.

So I'm told.

Kim channels Lorena Bobbit said...

When his nuts are missing. He was. He was..... ;)

henri said...

When his nuts are missing . . .

Now that I think about it, those women's magazine articles might have overlooked A COUPLE of things.

Husbands never cheat. What was I thinking? Bird Flu has begun to affect my central nervous system.

mcewen said...

Oh dear! And I came here for a little 'pick me up.' Fortunately my jaw surgery was on the medical insurance and after that experience I would never contemplate getting anything tweaked.

I am sorry for people who have such low esteem that they think this kind of thing is the answer.

I'm also a little inclined to think it's because they haven't got anything serious to worry about, but I am a little biased.
Cheers and thanks for including the article.

Amanda said...

I've waived goodbye to my girls for two sleeps...feeling a bit sad but still excited about kid free fun and mayhem with my step sister! Kim your my first REAL American - the others have either been brash, egocentric, stupid, or plain made you want to shake them just by being there and in some cases all of the above! I worked in a really old pub when I was younger and every single Yank that came in said "Oh Gee, ain't this place quaint!" If they followed it with an appreciation of bitter I let them off but the ones asking for Miller didn't get my best smile! So, the next time you're visiting USE SOME IMAGINATION BEFORE YOU OPEN YOUR GOB! and remember what you came for, warm beer goes with the territory so GET USED TO IT!

Kim slogs down warm beer said...

I shall down my warm beer with a smile and a large slice of spotted dick..... Really. I'll try. I will.

McEwen, caught me on a snarky day did you? LOL! Hope you're on the mend soon. I agree with you. I've no time for superficial angst, the good Lord has provided us with plenty of the real McCoy.

Wow, two "Feriners" to use a Bush'ism commenting in a row on my blog. I feel so cosmopolitian! Speaking of which. No, too early. Coffee it is. Sorry Amanda, no tea here until autumn! I'm still a Yank at heart!

KIM said...

Oh McEwen, your surgery was a while ago wasn't it? Did you have them sneak a little lower and do some work?? LOL!

John Elder Robison said...

I sure am glad I don't have eating disorders.

I'm a good eater. I've had a lot of practice, too.

And I'm sort of fat, but not too fat, and still useable for most common purposes.

Trust me, he's not fat said...

JER, I've seen you eat. "Hearty" describes your appetite. But at 6' 4" tall you need the energy. And you are not fat. Keep working out with your trainer and soon you will look like my Trooper. ;)

dallasgirl said...

Once again I say, thank the good Lord you live in the north. You know these people in the articles probably all live in my neighboorhood.

Did you hear the one about the teenager who is getting gastric bypass because she was not happy with her liposuction results??? Yes, I said teenager. Not 19, still in her mom's home.

Manic Mom said...

You need to have this in the Houghton Post (did I spell that right?)

I want donuts right now! And I am not going to work out today either!

Kim Stagliano said...

Manic, I'm working on it! If only I could freeze the kids! Huffington Post. Hurry up September!

Laura said...

Add me to the "want donuts" list. I bought some vegan, GFCF, etc. cupcakes the other day, thinking it would be nice to have something that Hutton could eat to celebrate my birthday. I ended up eating one last night. Not worth the calories. If I want something chocolate, I need to get the real thing - meaning butter, gluten and casein-filled! Like, say, a donut.

I'm been guilty of thinking of getting work done. I haven't actually done it, though, and I did help talk my sister out of getting a boob job. My SIL and I told her it was a waste of money, and her husband loves her the way she is, as do we. Ironically, my own boobs disappeared soon after that, and now I can't get a boob job since I talked my sister out of one. :)

Other than the boobs and the angry forehead 11s, I don't really care about how I look. I try not to gain weight (but by way of not pigging out every day and exercise, not by purging or not eating), shower when I get funky and pluck the scraggly eyebrow hairs now and then. I'm not in the market for a new man, so Hubby is stuck with me as is, and if he complains about me, I have things I can point out about him, too, but would never change him unless provoked!

Oh, and Amanda, I LOVE bitter. Do you like me? Please, please! Aw, man. Is it because of my boobs?

Stephen Parrish said...

Hey Amanda, I'm one of those Yanks who think your pub is quaint and your beer is warm. "India Pale Ale" makes Miller Lite seem heavy by comparison. The Brits should stick to spotted dick and leave brewing to the Germans.

Or am I just being jermorous?

Now I owe Kimmy $.10. If you don't know why, look here.

The Muse said...


It's always those "enviably skinny girls" who can eat donuts and slug down beer that chastise the rest of us for trying to look good. I'd have a complete overhaul if I weren’t so afraid of the risks and complications of surgery.

Our obsession with looking good is nothing new; it is just survival of the fittest (and most attractive.) We are hard wired to seek out those healthy and virile mates who increase the chances of propagating the species. Big boobs are a symbol of fertility that date back to 25,000 BC. and can be seen on ancient cave (porn) drawings. Plastic surgery is just tweaking the evolutionary process of selection.

Kim Stagliano said...

Muse, but at some point shouldn't we be happy with ourselves? I have horrible eyesight. I could get laser surgery - but I don't trust that it's foolproof and I love my actual eyeballs more than I am inconvenienced by glasses and contacts. We search for this elusive perfection and happiness to what end??

The Muse said...

Hey Kim,

I was just teasing you because of the bathing suit photo. (I didn’t expect to get such a serious response!)

I actually do agree with you that some people take it to extremes. But we are a visually oriented culture; and that’s not going to change. I try to eat very healthy, take lots of vitamins, and exercise. (Donuts are forbidden) I personally am petrified of surgery. I prefer a more holistic approach; but I don't think it's terrible when people have a little maintenance done. Although it is not a decision that can be taken lightly.

Kim Stagliano said...

Hi, Muse, I guess the busty fertility goddess hit a raw nerve... LOL! Try the donut today. It's Sunday.

It IS a serious topic though, although we can all find the humor in it. The other day I saw some male actor on TV and he'd had so many face lifts he looked horrible. It's jarring enough on women, on men it's down right WEIRD looking. I mean, have you SEEN Axel Rose from Guns N Roses' photo? Ew!

Kim Stagliano said...

Do we're driving home from church today (that's another post altogether) and I hear an ad for "Dr. Say Yes" who will approve any and all credit for plastic surgery. I kid you not. "My wife looks great and we've never been happier." Says the husband in the ad. ARGH!!!!!

The Muse said...

Hey Kim,

Look at it this way... the good thing about plastic surgery is that it expands the gene pool. Take dogs for example. Any vet will tell you that it's the ugly mutts and mixed breeds that are always the healthiest. However it's those over bred AKC pedigrees that have the most health problems. You see, it is survival of the fittest.

amanda's back and catching up said...

stephen parrish you are a heathen who has no appreciation of the finer things in life or true guidance like a CAMRA book....(campaign for real ale)

Kim Stagliano said...

Thank you, Stephen. I'm now wealthy to the tune of $.20! Sex Scenes At Starbucks owes me too.

Me? I like a Moretti with my Frank Pepe's pizza. MMMM, who knew Italians could make a tasty beer? It's a fairly light lager. I do love Bass Ale, Stephen. But Amanda, I drink it Americold. I admit it. Stephen, shall we send Amanda a case of new Coors Light (one of the crappiest beers out there)- they have a new label that turns the mountains BLUE when cold enough. Isn't that the dumbest gimmick??

Stephen Parrish said...

Amanda, I prefer the word "pagan," but "heathen" works for me too.

Kim, what we should send Amanda is:

1. AN ICE CUBE, so she knows what one looks like.

2. AN AIR CONDITIONER, so she'll know what it feels like to be in London all day without sweating her fucking ass off.

3. A FAUCET THAT RUNS BOTH HOT AND COLD, rather than two faucets, one hot and one cold, that have no utility whatsoever in the entire fucking universe.

4. WATER PRESSURE. If you don't know what I mean, you've never been to England.


6. AN APOLOGY for electing George W. Bush president.

7. ANOTHER APOLOGY for reelecting him.

Kim Stagliano said...

Hey, you live in Germany - Mark (oops!) used to travel there for business - he ran Leifheit for the USA and he'd complain about the lack of ice cubes for his sparkling water. He learned to drink sparkling mineral water in Germany. And we go broke on Pellegrino!

Amanda, you still have the best clotted cream anywhere. Take heart.

Still love the Yanks? :)

Amanda said...

OK, I'll admit the garmans may know a thing or two about hops but if you dare send me any coors I'll return to sender!
London? Why do you think I live in northern scotland??!
I have ice in my freezer and my TAPS work fine! (we have pressurized systems here you know!) Thanks for the double apology though.
Kim, if you drink beer and eat pud at the same time you will loose those doughnuts!!

Stephen Parrish said...

Okay, you got me. They don't serve cold drinks in Germany, either.

I love the food in Great Britain, I love the people, the scenery, the culture, everything but the faucets. Fix the faucets and I'll move there and even drink India Pale Ale.

amanda said...

Scotland. that's all you need to know, SP