Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Hello, Blogosphere. Is this mike on? Helloooo helloooo helloooo? OK, here I go.

I'm Kim Stagliano. No wait, that sounds too much like the start of an AA meeting.

Hi! Noooo. Way too E-harmony.com.

Hey there. Iccckkk, bad pick up line meets Freddie Boom Boom Washington.

Alright. Take 4. I'm Kim Stagliano, and my current claims to fame are as follows.

1) I have written and am shopping a manuscript called "Autism Is Murder." (unless an agent or editor asks me to change the name, in which case, I will toss that title into the trash faster than Joan Rivers ran to the plastic surgeon on her 40th birthday. Or was it her 35th?)

2) Mimicking. I can mimic almost any voice. Have you ever heard Zoe from Sesame Street tell Elmo to stick it where the sunny days don't shine? I can do that. And I can sing in about a zillion voices. I once sang nursery rhymes to my kids in Cher's voice. Cher is particularly adept at "Baaaa Baaaa Black Sheep" as you can imagine. When Alanis Morrissette sang "Itsy Bitsy Spider" my youngest daughter cried. But Alanis did get a little morose during the "down came the rain" part.

3) I can still fit into my wedding gown, although that little trick is starting to tread on Miss Havisham's territory if you get my drift.

4) I am the proud mom of three beautiful daughters who just happen to have autism. Yup. Not one, not two, but a hat trick! Stop shaking your head and thinking that I did way too many drugs in college. I've already taken that guilt trip, thank you very much.

I'd like to think we are a freak of nature, but I know plenty of families with multiple children with autism. Even 4 or 5 kids! Scary stuff people. Please note, I will rarely if ever refer to my girls as autistic. After all, kids with cancer are not called "cancerous." My children have autism. That means I can help them GET RID OF IT. Which is really how I spend my days when not blollygagging on this new toy called my Blog. More on that later.

5) I have a husband, whom my best friend and the gal who really encouraged me to write my book referred to this morning as, "your Division I husband." I refer to him as my man of steel for all the right reasons. Most of all, because he can weather any storm life throws at him, and we've had a Katrina of a life together, since the kids arrived.

So, welcome to my blog. Drop me a line. I'm off to use my Dyson. My life isn't all glamour you know.



bevrosenbaum said...

You are soooo funny--and you're off to a great start! If we're ever at the ABA together, signing autographs for the masses (we can dream, right?), I'd love to hear Cher singing nursery rhymes! (BTW, hubby and I once won a neighborhood lip synch competition doing Sonny and Cher!)

Kim Stagliano said...

Thanks, Bev! I wish I had a prize for my first commenter on my blog. On my home planet, ABA is a therapy used for autism. See how all roads lead there for me? Good luck with your new book "I was a Teenage Popsicle" -- Check out Bev's book this fall! Especially if you have teenaged kids!

KIMBALLY (as my mother in Massachusetts calls me.)

Lara said...

Hey Kim! You made it! Congrats. Welcome to the blogosphere. *grin*

Lara said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Allison said...

That was hysterical!! I just spit my coffee all over my keyboard and don't know how much longer it will last. Should I send you the bill for a new one?? Keep it up!! I have been telling people for months how funny this Mom I know is and can't wait to send them to your Blog to see for themselves.

Stacy said...

Hi, Kim. Welcome to the blogging world. I reluctantly joined it myself recently.

Rich O'Keeffe said...

Congrats and welcome to your blog. The way that I decide whether or not to continue reading a blog is to count how many references I don't get and thus need to google in order to see if I connect. So far only one....In all seriousness - I'm looking forward to seeing what you do with this tool

Manic Mom said...

Welcome to Hell baby! Blogging Hell. It truly is an addiction! Can't wait to read more!

Harvey Moskowitz said...

The hell with the autism stuff, Kim -- let's hear more about your Dyson, baby!!!!

Sara Hantz said...

Welcome to blogosphere.... guaranteed to become an addiction..... and much more fun than using a Dyson!!!!

Maureen McGowan said...

Welcome to blogland Kim!

And I love your "with autism" rule. And you didn't even correct me when we've corresponded about autism :-)

Here in Canada (Ontario, anyway), the government autism program comes under social services, not health care. Crazy. [Held over from the dark ages when people thought it was caused by mothers withholding love I'll bet.] And you're right. Using the appropriate terminology recognizing it as a medical condition will help change public opinion and insane policies like keeping it out of our health care system up here.

From now on, I do not have an autistic nephew. I have a nephew who has autism. Thanks.

Kim Stagliano said...

Maureen, you win the prize today! NY now has legislation to include autism in the world of medical insurance. So do a few other states. Imagine being told your child's cancer is curable or at least treatable, but insurance won't cover it because it isn't actually an "illness" it's a psychiatric disease. That's autism.

I've made the choice regarding my kids in the terminology I use -- I don't expect the world to follow but I appreciate your understanding where I'm coming from.

Cindy brought up Asthma and referring to kids as Asthmatic in her comments. Asthma, while certainly a serious condition, doesn't have the life-altering implications of autism, that's why I consider them equal, but separate.


Kim Stagliano said...

I forgot to mention, Asthma got an Arthur episode. My point is simply that Asthmatic carries a smaller stigma than autistic. Or at least conjures a less scary image. IMHO.

That Arthur episode is one of my favorites too. Right up there with the lice episode that ran last week, the day many of us on a writing loop were talking about a book about an 8 year old boy who kills caterpillars and commits murder (the human kind) getting picked up for publishing as many of us are trying to get our own "vermin-free" books out there.


JuliePozda said...

Kim, you are the best! It's been a bad autism day in our house today, and you've got me cracking up and have totally changed my mood. You have got a GIFT girl, and there is no one more deserving than you to achieve success with this book. Of course I'll need several signed copies and bragging rights that "she used to be my neighbor" when I see you on the Today Show and The View!

Kim Stagliano said...

Thanks, Julie! And a shout out to Day-Ton! Autism has introduced me to some of the finest people I've ever known. A strange blessing, but a blessing nonetheless.

Signed copies at The Learned Owl followed by drinks at The View, OK?


Lynn Jansen said...

Hi Kim, Lynn here...(Cindy's Sister).. (from South Africa) she lost your email address and I just did a search for you - and I find this!! Very cool! You sound very well...I'm glad to hear!Good luck with your book!!!
Cindy wants to get in contact with you...do you have an email address I can give her?
Anyway, hope to hear from you soon!!